I used to blog when I was in university. I even blogged during early labour with my first baby girl. But then being a first time mom and going back to school, well, life got pretty busy. Now I've completed school (I really hope!) and I've got two lovely daughters. I find myself looking for a creative outlet and a chance to talk like the intellectual adult I used to be. Of course as I wrote that my 3 year old repeatedly asked "Say hi to the duck, Mama. Say hi to the duck, Mama. Mama, say hi to the duck!" The toddler appeasing woman that I now am then said hi to a stuffed duck. Wow.
Anyway, the title is a nod to my geeky roots. The three heads is a reference to, first, the three-headed Hecate. My name is actually related to this dark mythological goddess. I've always loved the meaning of my name, Moon Goddess. Then while studying Shakespeare I learned that the meaning is even cooler than I imagined. It's related to the goddess of the night (or moon) Hecate. You can intrepret that to mean that she was related to all things "dark", but I would prefer to think of it as all things subversive. :) Ooooo, a word I haven't used in years! The feminist in me loves to ponder how, historically, simply being female was subversive and oftentimes considered "dark". Women are always moon-like while men are sun-like. You might think this upsets me. Au contraire, I've always fully embraced being moon-like. Inconsistent, glaringly bright at times and difficult to pin-point at other times. I love how women have managed to pop out through the pages of history just as the moon can find it's light despite the overwhelming presence of the sun. And of course, as my astronomy-loving husband points out, it is attention seeking to the point of blocking out all the stars around. :) But that's just the moon. Not me! Also, the moon can really be a nuisance once a month. Ahem. Er... anyway...
The second thought behind the three heads is likely related to the first. Hecate had a snake head, dog head, and a horse head. I, too, feel as though I wear 3 heads, at least! Mother, wife, girl/woman (haven't decided yet), teacher hopeful, daughter, sister, friend, etc. On any given day I have about 3 heads co-existing. Life has become manouvering between the different roles in a cohesive and beneficial way. I think I'm getting better at it.:) Although I suck at the friend head. It doesn't see the light of day nearly as much as it should. I apologize to my friends, I really do.
The heart is, I hope, fairly obvious. My life is full of heads but it's definitely full of heart. At this moment I have the tiny body of my 4 month old (hereafter called "S") curled up on me and my big girl ("N") looking at me with her big, blue eyes and chocolatey nutella all over her face. *heart swells...again*
I hope to write about more than just motherhood, although it is the most prominent of the heads, by far. I think it will be healthy just to write, even if no one reads. To remind myself that I am creative. To get back in the habit of writing. To remember that I can do more than meet the basic needs of my girls. And that I have more to say than "hi" to a stuffed duck. :)
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